Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Tub O' Brains

I had originally posted this on a different blog of mine, seeing the subject matter not suitably serious enough for this site. But I've decided that in all honesty, death and things related to it can be rather absurd. And that is the simple truth. It's also important to me to point out the humor behind death. Dying doesn't have to always be so heavy and serious. So, here is an only slightly inappropriate story that I will share.

I was showing Dan, one of my fellow co-workers, how to take a body to the morgue during night shift the other night - you see, it requires a little work and know-how to drop off a body at night as there are no staff in the morgue after hours. So you must get a key from security and sign the body in yourself.

So I am in the morgue with Dan, showing him the ropes (or the cadavers as the case may be). And I remembered that Jude, another co-worker of ours, had given me instructions as to where to go to view random formaldehyded organs. I had visions I'd probably picked up in movies of glass jars with eyes staring out at me; and Jude had insisted that the parts were kept under black light. These misguided bits of info delayed my finding the treasures.

But I finally found them. However, instead of glass jars of eye balls under black lights, we found small tupperwares labeled "brain." These were just like the tupperware you'd get takeout in. I will never look at take out the same again! And there was no black light, just a nauseatingly bright florescent illuminating the shelves and shelves of human tissue marinating in embalming fluids.

And then off in the far corner, we saw it. The Tub O' Brains. This piece of tupperware must've been the size of a small bathtub. And through the smokey haze of the white plastic container, we were able to easily make out human brains floating in a liquid bath. For days, casual talk between Dan and me of tupperware and dreams of tupperware have carried a whole new meaning.

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